Sex advice from....burlesque dancers

Burlesque Definition
-noun
1. an artistic composition, esp. literary or dramatic, that, for the sake of laughter, vulgarizes lofty material or treats ordinary material with mock dignity.
2. any ludicrous parody or grotesque caricature.
3. A humorous and provocative stage show featuring slapstick humor, comic skits, bawdy songs, striptease acts, and a scantily clad female chorus.

"Everyone should indulge in as much clitoris as possible." - Best quote ever.

Tassles Without Borders

Luscious strip teases, full figured mamas, tits and tassles, sequins and boas, boys willing to flash some skin with the ladies, and much, much more is what you’ll find at Toronto’s upcoming Burlesque Festival.

Risque performances from a sexy entourage of international and Canadian performers will grace various stages in the city from July 23 to 26th. The festival committee is spearheaded by members of Toronto’s own Skin Tight Outta Sight, one of North America’s first burlesque troupes.
Sexy Mark Brown will host the kick-off Meet and Greet Teaser at The Gladstone Hotel on Thursday the 23rd, which includes an art show, performances and a bra auction with proceeds going to the Boobalicious Weekend to End Breast Cancer.
You will also be able to learn the tricks of the trade at Canada’s only Burlesque University, where the seasoned veterans of erotic undressing will teach workshops on everything from fan dancing and persona development to the art of shimmying.

You’ll learn from star-studded pros like headmistress of the academy, Cocoa Framboise, featured below stripping away her shiny wrappings atop a candy apple. She started BOOM Chika BOOM burlesque classes in Toronto which blend Broadway jazz, burlesque and go go.

Other headline acts include international burlesque superstar Kitten De Ville, “Tools of the Tease” director and instructor Michelle L’Amour, the drag queen with a PhD in drama, Dr. Lucky, Canada’s own international pinup model, Roxi DLite, and Hot Toddy, co-creator of “Chicago Takes Off,” a burlesque charity benefit for aids.

On top of all these sizzling shows this year marks the debut of the Burlesque Marketplace, where artists can sell their crafts and sexy goods.

So if you want to experience this year’s internationally themed “Tassels Without Borders” you can pick up tickets at The Gladstone Hotel, Rotate This, Nearly Naked, Doll Factory by Damzels and online at T.O. Tix.
With so many hot little numbers coming to the city you better believe that lots of delicious candy will be unwrapped on stage. Because there's nothing sexier than a woman in control of her own fierce, voluptious, natural beauty, and she knows it too.

Feminist Porn Awards- Lady love all round

“I absolutely love fucking you!” exclaims Madison Young on stage to her co-actress, Ryan Dylan, as she clutches the first butt plug awarded this evening in Berkeley Church. The porn director and actress has just won the award for hottest kink movie, with her film “Perversions of Lesbian Lust, Vol. 1”, at Good for Her’s 4th annual Feminist Porn Awards.

Tonight feminist porn creators, actors and enthusiasts have gathered in everything from gowns to jeans to celebrate the achievements of the feminist porn community. On stage Young resembles a modern Aphrodite with her golden, open chest gown, matching pasties and tumbling strawberry blonde curls.

“We’re making waves in feminism one orgasm at a time,’ she says, wrapping up her acceptance speech.

Onlookers occupy the U-shaped second story of the church-turned-theatre, supported by white columns. On the ground level the audience occupies two rows of chairs in front of a giant screen on stage, which projects short erotic scenes from winning film makers as they accept their anal plug shaped awards.

In a brief clip from the Crash Pad Series 2 – Unlocked, winner of the steamiest trans scene, we see a woman in a black bra and panties whimpering as the tattooed woman on top of her bites her neck, pushes her down into the bed sheets and smacks her ass. The once rambunctious church is silent, save the occasional randy yell of approval. When the scene ends the audience erupts into cheering. The temperature has definitely raised a few notches.

Ryerson student and documentary film maker Joanne Loton graces the stage in a purple, layered number to announce the winner of the golden beaver award for Canadian content and most sensual softcore. Mimi Balfour nabs both for her flick “Man of my Dreams,” which involves the stereotypical studs, a cop and a blue collar repairman who both find a woman ready and willing to make love in their apartments. We catch a short glimpse of some sultry lighting and defined abdominal muscles which seem more at home in your typical City TV porno night.

The diverse male posse, Boylesque, delivers the awards on stage tonight, donning old school ties, suspenders, collared shirts and hats. “The more clips we present the more naked they get,” announces Deb Pearce, our host of the evening, with a blonde mullet and a flashy belt buckle.
Next, Coco La Crème takes the stage for her burlesque performance in a whirlwind of glowing, voluptuous mocha skin, turquoise feathers and glittering sequins. She turns her exposed cheeks to the audience, shaking them as she turns her head to give us a ruby lipped grin. Playing with her feathered skirt, she slips it off to expose a curvy stomach and thighs before yanking at her bra straps playfully with her thumbs. The bra goes flying, revealing golden nipple tassles adorning her generous breasts which rotate in wide arches as she winks with an aqua painted eye lid.

Throughout the evening Pearce reprimands the talkative bar crowd at the rear of the theatre. She wanders through the throng grasping her microphone, an image which is tattooed on her wrist, and interrupts chatting couples. “I’m the asshole trying to shush you tonight,” she says, beer in hand. With a white rose amidst a bob of curls framing her heart-shaped face, Courtney Trouble, owner of nofauxxx.com, gets a little teary eyed when accepting the award for most deliciously diverse cast. A preview of her winning film, “Roulette”, features two boys with Mohawks, jeans down around their bare, pale asses, stroking each other’s cocks on a rooftop.

Next the male and female heart throbs of the year are announced. Tyler Knight, an actor whose chocolate brown member is stroked two-handedly on screen is not present, but the spiky haired brunette, Dylan Ryan, gasps wide eyed with her hands clasped over her lips at the announcement. She accepts the awards after we glimpse a clip of her climaxing. “I’m completely honored,” she says and pauses, biting her lip. “This is an incredible business to be in, I’m very lucky and I’m very happy that you like the work that I do.” Alison Lee, the head organizer of the awards files on stage alongside the entire Good for Her crew to recognize their efforts. “Isn’t it fun showing porn in a church?” says Carlyle Jansen, in a corset and black shirt, while handing bouquets to the sex shop employees.
By now the butt plug delivery boys have stripped down to their briefs and Young gets on her hands and knees to hunt among the boy’s prominent packages for her second award of the night, indie porn pioneer of the year. She wanks off a man in yellow who’s bent forward, holding the prize above his ass, out of her sight. The audience is cracking up and someone yells, “I don’t think you’re going to find it in there.” “This is who I am. This is part of my art, of breathing,” says Young, after finally securing her award. We watch a clip of her being led with a chain around her neck by her then blonde-haired master, Ryan, who wears black platform stilettos. “I am so sick of seeing BDSM compared to torture. I’m really trying to destroy those stigmas,” Young says in a rush, her voice rising.

After a risqué lip-synching performance by Daddy K and the Rhythm Method troupe the evening wraps up with the movie of the year. “I was actually supposed to be in Ottawa getting banged right now,” says the Sasha Van Bon Bon, a member of The Scandelles burlesque troupe and Eye Weekly's sex columnist. She purses her lips, eyes scanning the audience and continues to say that she couldn’t pass up the opportunity to give the award for a film that got her so riled up she had to take three people home to deal with the situation in her panties. “There was no safe word that night,” she says.

Director Syd Blakovich wins for her women boxing themed film “Champion.” Wearing a vest with holsters and a sleeve of tattoos on her arm, she announces on stage, “I get nervous when I’m wearing clothes,” and proceeds to pull down her white trousers, revealing brief-style panties. She gives her acceptance speech rather quickly, blushing and laughing as Young kneels, placing her face in her director’s crotch for some public end of the night lip service.

*As published in mutedmag.com, with photo credits to Lana Paiement